Mags
It has taken me ages to get around to writing my story because so much is involved in trying to think about how to write it, all of the things that I want and need to say and get across, the things that have happened to me.
Before all this, I climbed Munro’s, I ran half marathons, I went to the gym even after a 12 hour shift at work. Little did I know how my life would change.
I didn’t even really think about vaccine injury until I started eventually making a link between my symptoms and the Covid19 vaccine.
My vaccines were all given in my left arm, which is where all my issues are. But first, a bit about me.
Before I caught covid October 2020, I did suffer with CFS, but I managed that well, was working full time as a midwife. I was able to do 12 hour shifts, both days and nights, I trained 4 days a week, sometimes after my shifts, I walked up Munros, I was an avid runner, and also I had my three grown up kids and my little granddaughter in my life who was just turning two.
I caught covid at work – my infection was relatively mild with some breathing issues (never hospitalised) but I did end up with CP (unknown).
I recovered from Covid pretty quickly and returned to work but I was plagued horrific fatigue, which I tried to manage like my CFS – by pacing, but it never worked.
I got my first vaccine at work on 16th Jan 2021 few months after having Covid. I went downhill pretty quickly. My fatigue accelerated, I had a fever again, felt flu like, suffered from breathlessness, and palpitations. I was being investigated for these. Chest Xrays, Echo etc had been done but everything was coming back normal. I tried a phased return to work on the 22/02/21, cancelling more shifts than I worked, then I was booked in again for my 2nd vaccine on 20/03/21.
I recovered from Covid pretty quickly and returned to work but I was plagued horrific fatigue, which I tried to manage like my CFS – by pacing, but it never worked.
That signalled the end of my phased return! I was experiencing horrific fatigue.
Another phased return was organised for 27/04/21 – to full 12 hour shifts (I couldn’t walk the length of me!) however, I did manage. I managed my symptoms as they arose. I had multiple issues, mainly fatigue, tinnitus, palpitations, weakness to one side, breathlessness, etc. my bloods kept showing I was low ferritin, low calcium and bicarbonate. I remained in work, managing my shifts until my next Vaccine on 29/09/21. Following this Vaccine, I was in work and I took an acute attack and collapsed shortly after delivering a baby, ended up in A&E, then admitted with severely low phosphate levels in my blood. I was on a 24 hour phosphate infusion. I got discharged home on phosphate and calcium tablets. I had issues also with my menstrual cycle, I still didn’t make any connections to my symptoms and the covid vaccine!
I was off work again, and tried to return on the 9/11/21 – desperate to try and ease my symptoms and regain normality. I started HBOT treatment on the 30/11/21 – this helped with symptoms a little.
On the 12/02/22 – I suffered what I could only explain as a thunderclap headache, really photophobic, and horrific left sided rib pain, which rendered me almost unable to take a breath. This was very transient but traumatising. I stayed in bed, thinking it was a migraine, but noticed when I was trying to get up to walk, I was so weak, mainly on my left side. I struggled, back off work again, crawling to the toilet on my hands and knees, then on the 18/02/22 I took a tumble down all of my stairs at home, and realised I had then developed a really bad tremor! Convinced I now had something like MS, I frantically tried to get an app with my GP. Unable too, I paid private and saw Dr Tyagi neurologist in Glasgow on the 24/02/22. He diagnosed me with FND, noted weakness on left side. I started seeing a counsellor on 3/03/22, trying to process what was happening to me, who was I?! I was still off my work, in a wheelchair as I couldn’t walk with this tremor, trying everything, KCR, hypnosis, acupuncture, vitamins, tablets from GP for pain, the pain that rips through my body! Omg!
I was trying to manage my symptoms, I was on and off my pill, trying to control my bleeding and symptoms there.
I joined a Nuffield programme to help with Long Covid on the 13/06/22 – this was a joke. They had no idea about PEM! It was a failure before I even started! You cannot exercise out of this nightmare, believe me, I tried!! I was part of a Covid clinic too – a multi disciplinary team made up of physios, and other drs. Again, all relatively new and didn’t have a clue what they were dealing with either.
As the months went on, I gradually grew stronger but really was just managing my symptoms and I did try and return to work on the 26/09/22 to a different area of maternity, answering phones and no clinical work.
I decided this time rather than get my flu and my covid vaccine together like I did every other time, I got them separate. I got my flu vaccine on 31/10/22 and my covid vaccine on the 14/11/22 (yes I know I did it again!!) and true to form, I was floored once again, this time it attacked my GI system! And my bloods went off again, my platelets went really high, and I was constantly having loose stool, everything I ate went through me, I had lots of accult blood in my . So I was referred for acolonoscopy, and gastroscopy! I managed to get myself back to work, got my colonoscopy on 31/01/23 started then getting UTI’s! Everytime I would get one, I’d go down! The tremor would return and was back on and off my crutches and ended up back off work again on 18/02/23.
At the end of March 23 I returned to work, my marriage of 17 years broke down and husband moved out (my choice) then I got a shingles infection following another UTI. On 11/05/23 I was off work again until 05/06/23 – still back and forth to Dr, pain management, nerve pain, neuro issues, tingling on left side etc, now reluctantly started on antidepressants (vertioxetine) . I’m on gabapentin, and bisoprolol to try and sort my racing heart, and help with my tremor, walking with crutches, and had to further reduce my hours at work again. And I am now down to just two shifts a week, from full time.
I’m still so lost, so broken, I am grieving, I always will. There are days when I get up and wish I wasn’t here! But need to be grateful that I am, I am still healthy ish, I’m just not me, the Mags that I knew, is gone.
